A lot of groups and projects break apart because of internal conflict. Here are some pointers on how to engage in productive conversations to keep movements together.
This article is adapted from a Mutual Aid 101 session Shareable hosted on November 20, 2025, titled “Navigating conflict when building power with Dean Spade.” Access to the webinar recording and supporting materials is available here. A shortened version of this piece first appeared in Nonprofit Quarterly on December 18, 2025.
There’s a lot of really intense conflict in groups doing resistance work, and it can get in the way of the work and stop new people from joining the work. It is my firm belief that if you do things that you care about with other people, you will experience conflict. We live in a conflict-avoidant society that tells us this is a bad thing, but conflict is actually normal and inevitable. Conflict doesn’t mean anybody’s doing anything wrong. Some very simple things can help us be a little more prepared to have conflict and to not end up leaving groups or leaving social movement work when we encounter conflict with other people.
We are living in very hard times, under great stress from ecological crisis, wars, increasing poverty, widespread criminalization, and so much more. One question we can all be asking is, how do we want to treat each other, knowing everyone is having a very hard time?
I have found that burnout is not usually just a result of being tired…it was the loss of trust, the feeling of being blamed or stigmatized, or not being listened to.
It can be hard to have a generous interpretation of others’ words and actions when you’re stressed out and feeling a lot of scarcity of time and resources. It can be hard to be patient and generous with kids, lovers, roommates, family members, friends, and people we are collaborating with on community projects. We could all be asking right now, what’s it like to try to be generous, even when we feel defensive or afraid? We can recognize that when we’re tired and stressed, we might be extra sensitive. People’s small mistakes or infractions might stir up old histories of times we were betrayed or not listened to across our lives. How can we be gentle with ourselves and others when everyone’s on edge, trying to get by?
Disappointment, conflict, and burnout in care and resistance work
People often experience a special kind of disappointment in resistance work. We join groups to do something that we really care about.